Dear FM, The conceit of this closeout is YAK. YAK as in one of our beloved EALs. YAK as in yap. YAK as in vomit. YAK as in You Already Know. And you do. YAK WTF is up. Because YAK just dropped an incisive scrut about Hanna L. Stotland ’99 and her work in getting students who have been expelled for Title IX violations back into reputable colleges. It’s another classic YAK slay that challenges the work Stotland does and, with it, the networks of power and misogyny that underlie cultures of sexual violence and pervade even “feminist” spheres. Be warned: Some quotes in here will have you laughing or yakking. Or both. Continuing the YAK slay, YAK conducted a 15Q with the FM-beloved English professor and journalist Michael Pollan. (Do you see why this closeout is YAK-themed now?) It’s a fantastic conversation between two very intelligent people about Pollan’s work on plants, psychedelics, and consciousness — what more could you want? Next, SAL unpacked the mystery of the house aides who lurk among undergrads, who you see in dining halls and think, “Wait? Didn’t you already graduate?” What are these people doing? Read the feature to find out; maybe it’ll inspire some yakkety yak about ways to stay on campus (read: away from the Real Adult World) after graduation. Finally, in this issue’s endpaper, ever-prolific KJK (YAK this is an incredible piece) reflects on passion — what it means to have one, and what it means to be someone who embodies it. Enough yakking from me! Some gratitude is in order. Thank you XCZ, JND, OWZ, SET, LJPE for continued design slays, with special shoutout to JND for the last-minute scrut cover design. Thank you LLL, BHP, JGG, AYL for killing it with photos and getting creative with presenting them on the site. So chef’s kiss. MJH, EJS, and CY, thank you for timely proofing and keeping FM in check despite how we chafe at authority (yeah, some of our pitches are a little out there….) Thank you to all FM execs, especially YAK and JL, for holding down the fort despite miscommunications, mishaps, and mis(sed deadlines). Special shoutout to our compers!!! for comping, with an extra special shoutout to those of you who came to our last writer’s meeting and picked up pieces. We are so excited to have you! And last but not least, HD — nothing like absence to remind you of the value of someone’s presence! Just kidding. Sort of. Thank you for still going through four hours of meetings on Monday. Hope the brain has been rested, the concussion vanquished, and the head helmeted. (I wrote this before I learned the concussion has not been vanquished — wishing you a speedy recovery!) FMLove, HD & KT