Dear Seniors: Here Are Some Post-Grad Plans If You Don't Have a Job

So you’re graduating, and you didn’t secure a six figure starting salary for your first job out of Harvard. Or maybe you want to ignore the reality of adulthood for the next few months. Here are Flyby’s suggestions for how to live your best life after graduation.

Backpack the World

We’ve all read (or pretended to read) The Portrait of a Lady. So, we know that going abroad solves all your problems. Fill a Fjallraven with every free t-shirt you got in four years of transformative education and head to, if you’re uncreative, Rome. Maybe you’ll even find a weirdly controlling husband…

Sleep, Finally

You haven’t gotten any for the last four years, and we (your roommates) know you haven’t gotten any in the last week, either. So, upload your resume to LinkedIn and then sleep your way to success. That’s how a Harvard degree works, right?

Build Character by Working in the Food Industry

If you have EVER not tipped, be prepared for your outlook to be forever changed. An all-black uniform, complete with Crocs, is calling your name. Genuinely, though, if you’re smiley enough to make tips, it’s really good money.

Haunt the Reunions

This is your last chance to network within the Harvard bubble, and you’ll actually get the attention because you’ll be the youngest person there! Simply couchsurf for a week, then find an alumni someone to pay your rent and get you a job after it is no longer socially acceptable to be unemployed.

Gaslight Everyone in Your Life Into Thinking You Work in Finance

Ever seen Not Okay, that movie on Netflix where a girl hides out in her apartment and convinces everyone via Instagram that she’s in Paris? Do that, but with a LinkedIn “I’m so grateful to announce” post. Jane Street is never going to know that they didn’t actually hire you.

Or, and hear me out: get a job. They grow on trees, obviously! Congrats, class of 2024!