Hi, I’d like to join your LinkedIn network.

We’ve all been there before: meticulously editing our LinkedIn pages, trying to figure out which perfectly crafted bio will finally catch the eye of that recruiter you think might stalk your page sometime soon, immediately hitting you up with multiple offers. Whether you’re the person that reads everyone’s LinkedIn updates (who needs Instagram, amiright?) or forgets to accept your ever-increasing number of connection requests, here’s a field guide to the different kinds of people you’ll meet on LinkedIn as you get on your #networking #grind.

The Mystery Connector

You’ve probably never met this person before. Whether it’s because you have zero mutual connections or they attend an obscure university somewhere across the globe, you’re not really sure how this person found you, and they know that’s what you’re thinking. Sometimes they’ll just shoot their shot and hit the “connect” button, but more often, they’ll write a mini-essay about why they want to connect. Your profile looked interesting? You happen to go to one of the most well-known universities on the planet? They would like to work with you? Everything goes!

The Influencer

This is the person who will immediately post about how lucky they are to accept their summer internship offer the day after it pulls up in their mailbox. They are also more likely to do this in February (???), leaving you stress eating microwave popcorn on your common room couch at 2 a.m. worrying about your own plans (this may or may not be speaking from personal experience). Throughout the rest of the year, they’ll post about the random positions they get, so expect lots of updates from them about participating in another Institute of Politics program, becoming an analyst at yet another finance club, or being first in line at the dhall. Either way, though, we’re happy for you! Keep achieving, but... maybe be a bit more chill on LinkedIn.

The “Can I add you on LinkedIn?”
We’ve all been there before. Whether it was the moment you first opened an account or a mad dash to 500+ connections, you’ve probably mindlessly hit that connect button more than once. Some people just keep going with it. Whether they saw you send a message to your class GroupMe once or read your name from their computer in a hundred person class, they’ll take anything as an excuse to add you on LikedIn. No need to ask verbally, either, since LinkedIn will do all the asking for them with their constant emails and notifications.

The Lurker

This might be that one guy you think you met at Opening Days, but you can’t be too sure. Why? Well, this account has no profile picture. Instead of a last name, they only have their initial. Usually, they’ll have Harvard listed on their profile (since that’s the most important thing before you get that Goldman internship) and nothing else. Bonus points if LinkedIn is their only social media and they take months to respond to your connection request.

The Celebrity

You’re not really sure why these accounts exist on LinkedIn. Did you seriously believe Justin Trudeau was going to offer you a job, let alone notice your profile? For a social media platform that exists to aid in networking, it’s a bit odd to see random celebrities, politicians, and miscellaneous rich people post the same life updates that they do on Facebook. How did they get their special celebrity profiles? When will I be able to reach that level? Only time will tell.

No matter how you choose to use your LinkedIn, here’s hoping that you enjoy it! Don’t forget to connect with @flybyblog for the juiciest networking opportunities (Author’s note: lol jk — unless interviewing Claire J. Saffitz ’09 is the opportunity you seek 😉)! Have fun stalking everyone from your section on LinkedIn.