Ways to Avoid Your Ex at Harvard

Dating a fellow Havardian is all fine and dandy until the day the relationship crumbles and you begin to bemoan the fact that you had to go and choose someone from a population of less than 7,000. Something about ending a relationship at Harvard prompts you to see them at every turn, encountering them more often than when you were together. If you’re really set on enjoying the rest of your Harvard experience without running into your ex — determined enough that you are willing to spare no expense — Flyby has you covered.

Say Fly-bye

If you’re one of the unlucky few that made the fatal decision to date intra-house, you may fret that you may never again enjoy a dhall meal in peace. If the thought of seeing your ex in the dhall is less than appealing, you may want to consider befriending the other Fly-By (the Harvard University Dining Services service housed under the Annenberg).

Remind Them You’re No Longer Their Ride or Die

Escaping your ex is no easy feat when you have nothing but your feet to carry you away. Once they’re no longer your sole-mate, invest in a scooter, so when you sense their presence, you can zoom away before the inevitably painful encounter. Bonus points if the oncoming herd (gaggle? flock?) of athletes accepts you as one of their own and lets you blend in with them.

Ex-periment with Makeup

Trying to avoid the ex who couldn’t make up their mind on anything? Take advantage of the fact that it’s still kinda spooky season and try a new look. Plus, rest assured that no matter how much makeup you apply, your days as a clown are behind you.

Say Far-ewell

If all else fails and you can’t get your ex to leave the country, you may have to take one for the team and go to the one place they will most likely never venture: the Quad. And if they’re in the Quad, avoiding them should be a breeze — one of the primary perks of dating a Quadling.

Though avoiding your ex is a great way to escape being reminded of a void in your life, it can only be a temporary solution. At the end of the day, this is your campus just as much as it is theirs, so expect to run into your ex — and who knows, maybe one day you’ll even smile and ask them to grab a meal (though whether you’ll follow up on that is another matter entirely).