Final Clubs: Take a Page From the Oak's Playbook

Oak club initiates had to carry around a plank of oak. Should the Bee follow suit? By Bridget R Irvine

We respect the “kind initiation” rituals of the Oak Club, which forced new members to carry around cumbersome planks of oak at all times. Here are some ideas for other final clubs, inspired by The Oak’s precedent of taking mascot dedication extremely literally.

The Bee: Carry a beehive

A great way to prove your dedication to this final club would be to carry around a beehive all week. You may get stung along the way, but it’s definitely worth it for the lifelong friends who love you for your personality. (Although, this mascot could also apply to the X—see below—which apparently seeks to promote Bumble.) Uh huh, honey.

The Phoenix: Light yourself on fire

You’ll fit right into the club if you light a small part of yourself on fire and keep it ablaze until the end of the week. Only a true Phoenix will be reborn from the ashes. Bonus points to the member who gets the fewest burns throughout the week.

The X: Get handcuffed to your ex

The way to show loyalty to The X? Get handcuffed to your ex (preferably with their permission). While handcuffing may have been an exhilarating part of your past relationship, this sort may be the thing that breaks the final few new members who weren’t up to snuff. Alternatively, exist, because that's ostensibly what the Exister Society does (but that's not so difficult).

The Spee: Hire a bear to chase you

The Spee has the potential to create a truly remarkable test for those sophomores wishing to join their ranks. What could be a more challenging than trying to outrun a grizzly bear to gain entry to the exclusive social club? Plus, there’s no better way to show off your connections than to call in your own personal bear on short notice.

As for the clubs we didn’t mention: get creative. The opportunities for wholesome initiation fun are endless.