Dude, That's Rude: Parties
Itâs a Friday night (or a Thursday night, if youâre particularly wild), and youâre ready to do things youâll either regret or forget. No night out goes off without a hitch, though. Not only does Harvard have a complicated social scene, thereâs always that one person who can turn a banger into a bummer. This oneâs for those rude folks.
âSorry, weâre at capacity.â
You yourself know this is the biggest lie youâve ever told. Your frat house is barely full and the partyâs only just started, but the bros left you in charge of weeding out the girls who arenât hot enough and actually go here instead of Wellesley. You figure this is the nicest way to put it. Hint: We see right through you and your boat shoes.
The Elbows and Knees Dancer
Weâll say this as gently as we can. You are a danger to everyone around you. Whether itâs your flailing arms or your ponytail whipping around, your moves are this close to taking someoneâs eye out. No matter how much you love to pop and lock and jam, you really have to rein it in. Or take it to a corner of the party.
The 2 a.m. Party âSourceâ
You assure the handful of people around you that you know where to go despite the fact that most parties are winding down. And then...you lead them on a wild goose chase thatâs a FOP-level trek through Cambridge before finally saying the partyâs âover.â Whatâs that, you say? Youâre sorry? Tell that to all the people who followed you in high-heeled shoes.
The Ambiguous Boston-Area Student
You loiter by a side door to Adams and wait for someone to swipe you in. You refer to the Quad by its street addressâwhere the heck is Linnaean Street? But we donât fault you for that. Youâre the one who does all the rude things on this list in addition to not even going here, and then you complainâin clear earshot of Harvard studentsâabout how bad the parties here are. Yeah, the doorâs that way, buddy!
Odds are youâve been a victim of at least one of these churls. But if you recognize yourself in any of these behaviors, let us be hopefully the last to tell you: Dude, that's rude.