How to Be Better Than You Were Last Semester

By this point, we’re sure you’ve tried to erase that one conversation you had last semester. You know that conversation. The one where you and your roommates talked about how much better next semester would be. How you made promises to lose weight and get organized over break. How you would finally do a voluntary juice cleanse—not one caused by the lack of options in the dhall.

But, alas, here you are. It’s February, and an abnormal sleep schedule isn’t the only thing you gained over break. But don’t worry! This month (even if it’s almost over) is where you really begin. This is the month where you start on your journey to become an Instagram honey in case Harvard falls through. Here are Flyby’s tips on how (to pretend) to be better than you were last semester.

This will not be you if you take our advice. By Laszlo B. Herwitz

Stop complaining about your life (at least publically)

Last semester you would’ve spent all of dinner whining about the food. Not this year. Now, all you let out is a soft sigh and pick at your food. After about ten minutes of this, you can quietly bus your tray and head to Jefe’s like everyone else.

Work out (or at least wear workout clothes)

After you start working out, you’ll realize that your body is the same as it was last year. But what you’ll come to realize is that you’d much rather be seen as someone who works out than to actually go through the pain of physical activity. So stock up on those workout leggings, sweatbands, and an assortment of Nike gear. This is the year of pretending to be fitter than you actually are.

Always consult your planner

We all know that you’ve technically had a planner since seventh grade. But buying a planner at the beginning of the year and using it for a week doesn’t count. This semester, whenever someone wants to grab a meal, go over a p-set, or really anything at all, make sure to check your planner first. And we’re not talking about that little calendar app that’s already on your phone; we mean a physical planner. Like, with a cover that makes you seem like a real-life adult. Like, with pages that you can dramatically flip through. It doesn’t even matter whether or not you actually have real events in your planner. What matters is that people think you do. (You can keep a list of your favorite daily snacks in there for all we care.)

Make new friends

The friends you have are great. They helped you through last semester, and you’re ready to tackle this semester together, blah blah blah. But that’s not the point. Remember how over break you spent an exorbitant amount of time on Instagram, wondering how fifteen-year-olds got triple the amount of likes your post garner? This is where new friends come in. Given the student population, Harvard has a surprisingly high proportion of students who are “casually into photography.” Befriend one of them. Nothing helps you step up your Insta game like a camera good enough to cover about 90% of your many flaws.

Convince your parents you’re a lifestyle blogger

We hope these tips put you on the path to a better you. And if not, make sure to check out our brand new blog GuysIPromiseIveChangedThisTime.wordpress.com for more fun tips for a great semester and year!