Can You Handle The Handle Bar?

Contrary to popular belief, the walk from your dorm to class to the dining hall to another class and back to your dorm does not count as strenuous exercise. Of course, from psets to recruiting events to extracurricular meetings, Harvard students have a litany of excuses for why we don’t have time to work out.

But what if the workout was awesome and intense and free? After all, college students love free stuff.

Until this Saturday, The Handle Bar is offering free classes to walk-in customers who show a valid student ID. Basically, all of Harvard could go to a legitimate spin class for free. What could be better than finally getting the cardio you’ve been pushing off for weeks in?

We here at Flyby decided to check it out and document the six stages of stages of spinning misery (and triumph):

Realizing you are probably the least fit person in the class.
There are svelte Cambridge soccer moms surrounding you. Their calves are in better shape than your organic chemistry grade. You weep softly.

Wondering how on earth someone can stay so cheerful while spinning.
This may or may not be directed at the peppy instructor who can somehow still shout encouragement while spinning at 5 rpm faster than everyone else: Thanks, but no thanks. But also, if you weren’t shouting at me I might actually have stopped moving my legs completely 5 minutes ago so...really, thanks.

Drinking more water in one 45 (or 60!) minute class than you have in an entire day.
You realize the importance of staying hydrated. You silently thank all of the clubs (looking at you, DAPA) who generously gave free water bottles. You then silently thank HUDS, Harvard bless their souls (and health), for always cleaning said water bottles.

Feeling like your legs have never burned so much. Ever.
How fast are you going? You’re probably going faster than that one time you had to had 5 minutes to make it from Sever to Science Center to turn in your problem set before it would be marked late. Probably.

Becoming convinced that you might just not make it to the end of this class.
Would it be socially acceptable to just give up? Wait, Harvard students don’t give up, unless it’s giving up in the sense of deciding to take CS50 pass/fail. You keep going.

Finally finishing, and feeling more triumphant than you did after finishing an exam.
And to think, you only cried twice.

Before midterm season hits us and you’re relegated to the sole triumphant feeling of making it out of an exam still breathing, do your body a favor, put your utilitarian college-student brain to work, and milk these free Handle Bar spin classes. You won’t regret it.