HUPD Crime Log: 8/30 – 9/8

The first few weeks of school have been rife with crimes of all sorts, from the sudden rash of cell phone thefts at a party in Adam’s senior house to the $17,121.75 worth of dental equipment that went missing from the Harvard Dental School last week. We don’t know whether to be terrified by the boldness of some people, or to be impressed.

August 30

Officer dispatched to a report of two individuals having sexual relations in the courtyard area. Officer arrived and report individuals gone on arrival.
We said the stacks! Have some decency.

September 3

FOX CLUB
Officer dispatched to a report of an individual screaming in the area. Officer arrived and report CPD on scene and report negative results.

Down with the patriarchy!

September 3

Officers dispatched to a report of an individuals passing around a bottle of alcohol while waiting for the shuttle bus. Officers arrived and report individuals gone on arrival.
Boozy bus rides are ALWAYS the way to go.

September 4

MATTHEWS HALL NORTH
Officer dispatched to a report of a group fighting in the area. Officer arrived and report individuals gone on arrival.

WORLDSTAR!

September 5

Officers dispatched to a report of an individual swinging a gold club in the area. Officers arrived and report individual was just twirling their cane waiting for their ride.
So basically, what you’re saying HUPD, is that we should hit this person up to cover our textbook expenses?

September 8

Officers dispatched to a report of an individual in the area with a shopping cart looking into several windows. Officers arrived, located individual and sent them on their way.
“Ooh, that’s a nice lamp. Don’t mind if I do,” he thought as he reached through the student’s window.

Check back next week for our next installment of HUPD Crime Log!