HUPD Summer Crime Log: 6/1-6/15

Schools out, and Harvard students have spread far and wide from New York to Washington, DC to take finance and consulting internships. But even though we're off having fun (or at least making money), the brave men and women of HUPD continue to defend our campus. Let's see what those pesky summer school students are getting up to:

June 1
Officers dispatched to a report of individuals possibly vandalizing the statue. Officers arrived and report individuals gone on arrival and no vandalism done to statue.
None that you can see…

June 2
Officer dispatched to take a report of annoying messages left on an individual's phone.
Bruh, they won’t let me leave this group chat.

June 3
Officer dispatched to take a report of a stolen package containing Pomade hair products valued at $32.00.
Update 6/6/16: Upon further investigation this incident had been previously reported. The individual's property was not stolen but held for safekeeping.
No, Becky, I did not take your hair products.

June 7
Officer dispatched to take a report of annoying emails.
No, I will not give you an extension, Jimmy. The school year’s over already!

June 7
Officer dispatched to a report of three individuals possibly smoking marijuana. Officer arrived, located individuals and report a cigarette being put out with a strong odor of marijuana coming from it. At this time, additional officers were notified and on scene. While the three individuals were being run for wants/warrants which came back with negative results, two of the officers discovered drug paraphernalia and also marijuana near the three individuals. An officer then issued all three individuals with verbal trespass warnings for all Harvard University property. The individuals were then sent on their way and the marijuana and drug paraphernalia were confiscated.
The real question is what happened after the marijuana was confiscated…

June 7
Officer dispatched to a report of a damaged sprinkler head. Officer arrived and report no damage done.
Lolz made you look.

June 9
Officer dispatched to take a report of an attempted forcible break into a vending machine.
The damn thing wouldn’t give me my gummy bears!

June 10
Officers dispatched to a report of four individuals in the area who may not have authorization to be there. Officers arrived, located individuals and report individuals were part of a moving company and were allowed to be in the area.
I mean, if you want to carry this futon, officer, be my guest.

June 14
Officer on detail sent an unwanted guest on their way.
S.O.S my crazy ex is stalking me again

June 15
Officers dispatched to a report of an individual in the area urinating on the side of the building. Officers arrived and report individual gone on arrival.
You just couldn’t wait till you got back to the Quad, could you?

June 15
Officer dispatched to take a report of a stolen Android cell phone valued at $300.00.
The real question is why did the person have an Android?

June 15
Officer while on patrol observed a small mulch fire. BFD arrived on scene and extinguished fire.
Just making my monthly sacrifice to the Lord of Light, you know. Gotta keep the face looking young.