HUPD Police Log 9/22 - 10/12: Stolen Elevator Doors and Disappearing Swordsmen

HUPD has had their hands full with us Harvard students over the past few weeks. Between annoying texts, stolen cleaning supplies, and wall twerking, it seems that a lot's been going on around campus. As part of our Securitas Series, we've combed through recent HUPD logs and published some of the more colorful entries below.

September 22
Officer dispatched to take a report of an individual who had received an annoying text message.
Too many emojis.

September 25
Officer dispatched to take a report of stolen unsecured and unattended elevator doors.
Elevator doors are usually secured and attended?

September 27
Officers dispatched to a report of a loud party and individuals banging on the walls. Officer arrived and report party was ending.
Please, wall twerking was so 2013.

October 1
Officer dispatched to take a report of a stolen package containing a bottle of Lysol Power and Fresh cleaner.
A neat freak’s actual worst nightmare.

October 2
Officer dispatched to take a report of a stolen package that contained a Henckels knife valued at $34 and a power strip valued at $16.
Amazon Prime for the win.

October 4
Officers dispatched to a report of an individual on a bicycle with what seemed to resemble a sword on their back. Officers arrived and report individual gone on arrival.
Eco-friendly sword swallower.

October 5
Officers dispatched to a report of a person making loud noise while playing the violin. Officers arrived and spoke to the reporting party who stated they will talk to the building manager.
Can the ‘reporting party’ get off this violinist’s Bach—he shouldn’t have to be Haydn his talent!

October 6
Officer dispatched to take a report of a stolen package containing a leather toiletry bag valued at $300.00.
Is this overestimating or overcompensating?

October 7
Officers while monitoring a lecture observed an individual constantly interrupting the lecturer. The moderator asked the individual to quiet down numerous times to which they did not comply. The moderator requested the individual to be escorted out of the area. 
Dreams do come true. HUPD finally takes down the overeager participant in lecture we all love to hate.