Survive Lab as a Humanities Concentrator

Maybe it's for your SPU requirement, maybe you just drunkenly ended up in the Bio-Labs, or maybe you're like me, and you just wanted to play with chemicals. Regardless of the reason, it's happened—you're are in a lab class. Your strong verbal skills and College Board approved vocabulary won't help you here. As I like to say, science is hard. But luckily I have some tips that will make lab a little easier for us humanities concentrators.

1. Don't Cry

Don't do it; it's a waste of waterproof mascara. It's not that the hard sciences are heartless; it's just that my tears, which would have moved my government TF, did nothing to move up my lab grade.

2. F=MA

It is the golden rule of the science classes, what you say when you have no idea what the polarity a calcium molecule is or why your test tube is on fire. This magic equation will guarantee you partial credit at the very least. Trust me—this is how I passed AP Physics and my driver's test.

3. Suck Up

Not to your TF, but to that smart kid that sits next to you. Buy her Insomnia cookies, compliment her haircut, and seduce her with your lab goggles. This way, when it comes to choosing a lab partner, or blaming that toxic chemical spill on the kid behind you, you'll have someone smart on your side. If you feel guilty about mooching too much and want a more symbiotic relationship (science term!), give back to the partnership by coming up with a good lab group nickname or sharing your knowledge of F=MA.