How to Shed Those Post-Thanksgiving Pounds

By now, you’ve probably woken up from your turkey-induced coma and gotten back into your normal weekday routine (just in time for reading period to start and mess with it again). And let’s be real—the only exercise you got over break was from stampeding innocent fellow shoppers on Black Friday. So, to help you lose those post-Turkeyday pounds, Flyby suggests taking some of these easy steps:

1) Walk to the MAC. Slip into your sneakers, grab your blender ball, and prepare your body for exhaustion. While there are plenty of fitness classes available inside the Malkin Athletic Center, these are really all superfluous. After a pleasant stroll to and fro, you should start to feel the pounds melting away.

2) Force yourself to eat in Annenberg. Rigorous exercise (Step 1) is really only half the battle—the other half is diet. By making yourself visit Annenberg for every meal you will guarantee that you will rarely overeat. This even applies to upperclassmen, who might want to sneak in and relive their frosh days.

3) If you do decide to venture out into the gastronomic paradise that is Cambridge, make sure that you eat right. Stick exclusively to healthy foods, like Yogurtland. It’s just frozen yogurt, which is just frozen milk, so it’s just frozen calcium. Don’t worry.

4) Visit a friend in the Quad. Undoubtedly, the trek to this distant region of the galaxy is arduous but will pay dividends if you are trying to drop that turkey weight. If you get winded, you can always hail the shuttle to take you the rest of the way.  For extra motivation, promise to treat yourself to Insomnia when you get back.

5) Train like Rocky. Put on some grey sweat pants (don’t worry, no one will judge), jog around Harvard, and punch a ton of meat in a local butcher shop. Finally, run the steps of Widener and bask in your own glory. Pump-up music optional.