An Idiot’s Guide to Baseball
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Senior Eric “Boomer” Eadington took the loss in the first game of Saturday’s doubleheader against the Tigers at O’Donnell Field. With Harvard up 3-0 through the first six innings, the senior didn’t allow a single run until the seventh, when Princeton’s Nat Baird plated teammate Mike Ford. A furious rally ensued, which saw the Tigers score five runs.
UPDATED: Oct. 30, 2013, at 10:53 p.m.
So as you might have heard from your roommates, your professors, or even a random tourist that put his hand on John Harvard’s foot, the Red Sox are 3-2 in the World Series. If you didn’t know that, you have been studying in Lamont for far too long. But don’t worry, Flyby has some basic tips so you don’t look like a total fool when friends invite you to watch tonight's game.
1) Don’t scream home run every time the baseball get hit by the bat. It’s like screaming “GOOAAAL” every time you see a soccer ball being kicked.
2) You know how in basketball, the team get points for just putting a ball in the hoop? WIth baseball, it’s not that simple. The team doesn’t get a point for just hitting the baseball. First of all, they don’t score points, they score runs. To get a run, a player bats at home plate and must go to first base, second base, third base, and back home. Getting home is even harder than it is for Quadlings: in baseball, there is no shuttle.
3) The most exciting game are the ones when no hits anything. This is called a “no-hitter”. Don’t believe us? You’re right, we’re joking. Of course this is boring. But in actuality, it may take hours for someone to even hit the ball let alone run around the baseball field (also called a diamond for those who missed middle school geometry). They might not even make it all the way. But it represents great skill on the part of a team’s pitcher and its defense.
4) Because it can take a long time for a ball to be hit, you might want to bring some refreshments. Baseball games don’t have the same time limits like football or basketball. So stock up on some Honey Nut Scooters, graciously provided by HUDS, and enjoy the game.
5) You go to Harvard, you root for the Red Sox. This is true even for you New Yorkers and especially for those from St. Louis.
With these tips, you should seem at least competent in baseball knowledge. For all the other things we didn’t mention, BS it like you did your last midterm.