Late Night Food Fight: IHOP

It's 1:30 in the morning, and you're hungry. But where do you go? It is a divisive debate among the Harvard student body, and loyalties to the Square's late-night stops run deep. Over an 11 day period, The Crimson will debate 11 popular choices around campus. Now up (in poetic form): IHOP.

It was a snowy, frigid night,
And all through the Square
The undergrads were sleeping,
Their snores filled the air.

But three blockmates, awake?
Half past two in the morning.
Their stomachs were grumbling,
Where to get the food they were yearning?

The Kong and Felipe’s
Were probably closed,
The Market or CVS?
They would freeze their toes!

"We just need a place
To finish psets in peace!"
"I refuse to put on
Pants not made of fleece."

The last blockmate yawned
He'd been up since dawn
"I want to sit at a table
And be waited upon."

And so the challenge was on
The terms were set.
But the three Harvard sophomores
Had not found a place yet.

Then through the exhaustion,
A glimmer of genius,
"I know what to do!
IHOP will feed us!"

It's perfect, they thought
Welcoming and warm.
Open ‘til four
And right near our dorm.

So they put on their parkas
They strolled out the door
They faced down the snow
Of the cold, harsh world.

IHOP's glow in the distance:
Like Gatsby's green light.
A beacon of hope;
Soon all would be right.

They stumbled through the door,
"A table for three!"
In a matter of moments,
Their food they could see.

Eggs and hash browns
Piled high on the plate
Steaming warm pancakes
Oh goodness, how great.

The tired three students,
Now warm and sated,
Started in on their homework,
Which ‘til then had waited.

The only interruption
Was to refill their drinks
("It's bottomless?!" you inquire,
"Of course!" one winks.)

Until four a.m. comes,
For all good things must end,
The students pay up,
("That's it?" they commend.)

Indeed, a cheap meal
But of grade undeniable
They received that morning
At the sole locale viable.

And they rolled into bed
In their House near the town
Their stomachs were full
Of food which will be crowned

The best in all the land
When hungry at night,
IHOP above all else.
Others can't put up a fight.