Sample Fruity Beverages, Cure a Hangover?

Can a fruity beverage lessen a hangover? A new beverage company, founded by Harvard graduate and former Crimson President Josh H. Simon '00, claims to do just that. Function Drinks, a company “created by physicians,” aims to combine great flavor with “unique and powerful functionality,” according to the company's Web site. With flavors like Acai Pomegranate, Strawberry Guava, and Citrus Prickly Pear, Function Drinks is targeting college students across the country with its new, brightly colored beverages.

Function Drinks came to campus Thursday to test its product on its target audience. Right around lunchtime at Greenhouse Café, Area Sales Manager Cassy Dow hawked the product to Science Center passers-by.

If you were drawn by Dow's siren cries, you had two flavor options: Goji berry and Peach Mango. Dow said that choosing between the two is difficult. “I always tell people that choosing is like asking if your mom likes you or your brother better. But I’d have to say Goji Berry because of its functionality.”

Function Drinks come in three categories: Urban Detox, Light Weight, and Alternative Energy. According to the back of the bottle, the Urban Detox variety targets the “city warrior” who “jog[s] in the smog and part[ies] on work nights.” (We can't help but wonder—do Cambridge residents qualify as city warriors?) Light Weight, at only 10 calories a bottle, supposedly "ignite[s] your natural metabolism" and keeps you looking slim. Finally, Alternative Energy can “keep you going all day and all night long.”

Apparently, celebrities like Madonna, Fergie, and Lauren Conrad have been seen toting these drinks as well. But not everyone is willing to open up their wallets for a bottle. Austin C. Glamser ’12 grabbed a sample of the Goji Berry before heading to class, and we caught him taking his last sip. Though Glamser said that he liked the drink, he told us he would never buy it. "I was just like awesome, free samples!” he said.