"Rush Hour 4: Bring on the Funk"

Ye Olde Quad Library will be home to its first party of the new school year tonight, and FlyBy predicts its going to be a barn burner. "Rush Hour," a title that highlights interracial collaboration between the Black Students Association, Black Men's Forum, and Chinese Students Association, will kick off at 10 p.m, and better yet, admission is free.

"I basically thought it was a great buzz word," said Rebecca Gilmore '12, the BSA's Arts and Entertainment chair, who explained that the CSA chose the name "Rush Hour." She added that the BSA is trying to "encourage collaboration" with student groups not just within the black community, but also outside of it.

Well we here at FlyBy applaud this thinking outside the box, and while we can't be in attendance tonight, we've got some predictions as to how this East-meets-West hootenanny is going to go down. These predictions are, of course, entirely based on the most excellent movie from which the party derives its name, and we make no claim to accuracy. But in our hearts we know we're right, and you will too if you check out our predictions below.

The BMF will be in charge of the music. This is common sense. You never touch a black man's radio.

The CSA will brood around for the first hour or so while coming to terms with the fact that they have to party when they should be out looking for the diplomat's daughter. Or something like that. The BSA/BMF combo will pick up the slack.

An evil criminal mastermind will try to smuggle relics out of the library, forcing the BSA and CSA to unite in order to undermine this plot and save face. Someone will play "Make it Rain" and dollar bills will fall everywhere ya'll.

There will definitely be some "Kung Fu Fighting." Definitely. We've done some calculations, and we're pretty sure the kicks will also be fast as lightning.

Two freshmen will go to the hospital. No, that's not in the movie, we know. It's just the facts of life. Freshmen drink too much. They go to the hospital. Sorry for the spoiler parents, but if you get a phone call between the hours of midnight and 2 a.m., don't say we didn't warn you.

Now that the quad library is book-free (do they just call the whole thing SOCH now?), we look forward to many more parties of this sort. Who needs books anyway when you have a space to get together, put aside your differences, and just boogie? I'm sure all the quadlings would agree with us here. Especially in two months, when they have to shuttle themselves back and forth from Lamont, AKA Hell, every day.

Photos courtesy Wikimedia Commons