Recap: "Enough About Eve" and Vanessa too, please!

We're back again for another riveting round of Gossip Girl storyline ratings. Last night's episode was actually pretty hilar. So, Nate has an idea, Vanessa has a mom, Blair turns Chuck gay, everyone wears chunky necklaces, and Scott dies (okay, wishful thinking). The usual, after the jump. Only a few spoilers this time.

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The boring Nate has an idea storyline.

Plot twist: Nate, yes, Nate, has an idea! +1

NateFail: The idea sucked. -100

Tries to use Serena. -5

Serena finds out and one ups him. -10

Best moment: Nate's face, when Serena loses his steep, steep wager. O_O +1

Overall: -113

The Serena is sad/maybe Carter will finally leave the show storyline.

Tragic Flaw: Carter is a little biatch. Too easily emasculated. -17

SerenaFail: Failed to get any action. -10

Suffered two incredibly unprofitable rounds of poker in the name of love in which vapid Nate was of no help. -3

She even used candles. -1

Hooking up with Carter would have sucked anyway. +1

Fashion Faux Pas: Serena's one-armed deep purple dress. Not a fan. -3

Overall: -27

The Vanessa screws up over and over storyline.

PowerPlay: Successfully took down Blair in the NYU parents' dinner toast selection process. +5

Tried to use foolish Dan to knock Hilary Duff out of the running for the toast at the NYU freshman parents' dinner. +3

VanessaFail: It failed. -7

Dan and "shallow Hollywood celebrity roommate" Hilary Duff are now mad at her. -2

Disowns her hippie-liberal mom who doesn't believe in universities or sugar in attempt to win back Dan and famous roommate's good graces. -1

Her mom overhears and disowns her. -3

Dan and Hilary Duff are still mad. -5

Looks like V's not getting an invite to the "[Mali]bu" anytime soon. -10

Fashion faux pas: Smugness does not become V. -7

Neither does jealousy. -9

Vanessa's hideous non-shirt and tacky gumball necklace at the NYU parents' dinner. -5

Best moment: Blair's look-over of said non-shirt, after tooling on Vanessa for being a self-righteous, insufferable loser. Perfectly timed, perfectly executed. +3

Overall: -38

The Hilary Duff and Dan are both dumb and easily manipulated storyline.

Tragic Flaw: No one cares about them. -9

PowerPlay: Hilary Duff makes Dan wear the hideous talking plush watch. +1

A whipped Dan "makes" a.k.a. burns an entire chicken for Hilary Duff. +3 for effort

Best line: Hilary Duff, pretending to be a shallow Hollywood celebrity. "I love you too, bitch!" +2

HilaryFail: Does too good a job of pretending to be a shallow Hollywood celebrity. -15

Overall: -18

The Blair gets owned storyline.

PowerPlay: Has Chuck Bass wrapped around her finger. FOR FOUR EPISODES. +50 x 4

BlairFail: Falls for Vanessa's scheme, exposing her evil machinations to the entire freshman class and shocked parents. Oops? -11

No longer has Chuck Bass wrapped around her finger. -50

Fashion Faux Pas: Chuck's haircut. -2

Worst line: "I'm upset because I kissed somebody who wasn't you." -2

Redeeming quip: "What, you think I've never kissed a guy before?" +3

Overall: 138

The Jenny is a loser storyline.

JennyFail: Her Leo DiCaprio joke. It wasn't funny. -1

Fashion Faux Pas: Lose the hair extensions. ASAP. -3

Overall: -4

The creepy Scott lost his creepy storyline storyline.

Overall: +1000000