Belltower Separates the Boys from the Boyz

Vast geographical distances may separate Lowell and Pforzheimer, but one thing above all seems to bridge this gap: a shared love of shirtless dudes on calendars.

“I wanted to do something ridiculous, to give the House some ‘exposure,’” said Alex L. G. Hugon ’11, the mastermind behind a plan to raise Lowell’s status on campus with a swimsuit calendar featuring 12 male Lowellians that will be sold for five to ten dollars. He calls his 12-man pack of models the “Belltower Boyz,” after the famed Lowell bells.

What’s in a name? A lot, it turns out. The “Belltower” brand has traditionally been associated with Pforzheimer House’s Moors 410, a notorious party suite located underneath the House’s bell tower. Its 12 senior residents, who had allegedly pondered posing for a calendar way before the Lowellians did, were aghast to find that not only had a group beaten them to the punch, but they had also stolen the “Belltower Boys” moniker, albeit with a “z.”

“Lowell has a bell tower? I thought they only have rats,” said Parker L. Wright ’11, a member of the rival calendar gang.“Lowell is best known for stealing Russian bells and then returning them,” said Adam J. Clark ’11, another swimsuit model and Moors resident.Despite the competitive tensions running high, members of both groups say that their ultimate aim is to help people with the calendars. The Lowell boys intend to donate the proceeds to a local charity, and the Pfoho boys intend to use their calendars to promote safe drinking practices. They also believe that there will be other benefits as well.

“It will make a really good Christmas gift for your mom and grandma,” said Scott M. Elfenbein ’11, another calendar boy from Pfoho.Two groups of 12 dudes, two higher purposes, one name. Can you spell war?

Not so, insisted Hugon. “There is no rivalry. I’ve never even stepped foot in Pfoho!” However, when asked who would emerge victorious in a “calendar pose-off,” he laughed, and perhaps flexed his abdominals a bit. “Is that a serious question?”