"Sex Drive"

The road film is a Hollywood tradition. From “Easy Rider” to “Harold and Kumar” to “Little Miss Sunshine,” these movies have a definite appeal as the viewer falls in love with characters who find themselves on a journey filled with allegorical obstacles. Too bad, then, that “Sex Drive,” the new movie from director Sean Anders, is the road trip as we know it in real life—the kind where you could care less about the drive. It’s the sort of road trip that gave birth to the phrase, “Are we there yet?” Although “Sex Drive” produces a few memorable scenes and an over-the-top ending, the process of getting there is tedious.

Ian (Josh Zuckerman) is an angsty teen in love with his good friend Felicia (Amanda Crew), who has no idea that Ian wants to be more than just friends. His best friend Lance (Clark Duke), who looks like a paisley-clad Clay Aiken, is an implausible Don Juan figure. In a world where everyone is getting action except Ian—from his 14-year-old younger brother to his dad—Ian feels pressure to lose his virginity and rid himself of the perceived stigma. With Lance egging him on, Ian decides to drive from Chicago to Knoxville in a desperate attempt meet up with an internet acquaintance named “Miss Tasty.”

Of course, almost any reason for a carpool of characters to drive spontaneously cross-country will tend toward the unrealistic. Usually, however, the actors’ charisma helps you look past the initial premise until the characters have a chance to develop a certain depth. “Sex Drive” is not so accommodating. During the first half hour it’s difficult to tell if the actors are actually trying to look vacant or if they’ve simply forgotten that the camera is rolling. In an opening scene where Ian accidentally hints at his love for Felicia, actress Amanda Crew delivers a momentary blank stare, as if forgetting to react.

The one bright spot is James Marsden’s performance as Ian’s jerk older brother Rex. He delivers lines attacking Ian in a way both brutal and hilarious. Take, for instance, his insight into Ian’s love life: “You’re 18 and you’ve never had a girlfriend. That’s how you get gay.” Unfortunately for the audience, Rex’s role in the movie does not figure prominently.

“Sex Drive” follows this theme throughout—getting the peripherals right, but lacking central content. The audience will probably walk away with the memory of minor details, like the soundtrack, which fits perfectly with a number of scenes in the movie. The way Instant Messenger graphics pop up like a thought bubble next to Ian while he’s online is clever. Seth Green is great as the random Amish car enthusiast, and Fall Out Boy makes a surprise appearance. Even the humor works best when not located front-and-center: a rack of guacamole donuts behind Ian at Señor Donut draws a smile, but a scene in which Ian talks to a toddler while dressed like a donut with an erection is less successful.

The good news is that after an hour or so of painfully rehashed teen movie clichés, “Sex Drive” begins to pick up. When all the characters and events leading up to Knoxville come together, Ian and Lance finally develop some personality beyond the two-dimensional, and some good laughs are in store after Ian meets Miss Tasty.

Although not particularly memorable along the way, “Sex Drive” is worth it at the end. In this sense, it might be the truest road movie of all, mimicking the monotony of the real-life experience. If you have nothing to do and the time to spend, the destination is pretty nice—you just have to suffer the journey.

—Staff writer Rebecca A. Schuetz can be reached at schuetz@fas.harvard.edu.