Hate it: Google Mail Goggles

The people who gave us the glorious Gchat are about to take away another one of everyone’s favorite things.

Gmail just installed Mail Goggles, which makes you answer five math questions before sending e-mails on late weekend nights, boding poorly for alcoholics and humanities majors.

It may seem helpful, but Gmail is about to seriously harm most of your social lives. See, the drunk e-mail lets you to say what you’re really thinking with the perfect excuse already lined up. “Heyyyy yoooure wyaay ciiiite” can be shrugged off, no problem. “But isn’t it sad that you need a drunk e-mail to talk to the boys you like?” you ask. Yes, well we can’t all be the charming socialite you are, engaging in actual conversation or whatever.

One can only assume that there are hundreds of shy guys out there thinking the same thing I am, and Mail Goggles would ruin my chances with all of them.

Not only are there social benefits we’d lose, opportunities for learning and exchanging knowledge would also be diminished. If it weren’t for the drunk e-mail, I wouldn’t understand life the way I do today. With Mail Goggles, my roommate’s opus on the meaning of universe would never have found its way to my inbox. For one, math is not her strength. And for two, she might have paused and thought, “Is this really something I want to send out to half of my address book?” I think I speak for all 76 of us when I say that e-mails like those should be sent daily.

Oh, and that drunk e-mail I sent you last weekend? What a hilarious thing to reminisce about in the drunk wallpost I’m going to leave you tomorrow night.