Many Delicious Donuts Meet Demise

Dan P. Lane ’07 blazed—or glazed—his way to victory last night in the third annual Athletes in Action doughnut eating competition, downing a dozen rounded pastries in just under two minutes, 10 seconds.

Kara M. O’Reilly ’07, Kyle Cutter ’07, and Amanda C. Slaight ’08 took home the women’s relay title, eating a combined 12 doughnuts in 2:15.

On the men’s side, 13 students raced to scarf a dozen donuts, while the women’s division saw nine three-member teams in a four-doughnut-a-piece relay.

The difference between the two divisions is a matter of taste. As the competition’s emcee—Danielle Thiriot ’07—put it, “The men’s event is the distance event. It’s all about pacing yourself and finishing the whole dozen. The women’s event is the finale; the sprint, how quickly can you stuff your face.”

And stuff they did.

The men’s champion said he was drawn to the grueling—and drooling—sport because “I’m a big eater anyway, so I thought, why not give this a shot.” Lane added that he’s training for an eating contest in Boston.

Lane manifested his mastery of mastication. He gracefully alternated between the greasy ring in his right hand and the cup of water in his left.

While Lane took the measured approach, runner-up Kevin O. Orfield ’10, went the opposite way. “My strategy was to put them in whole,” he said. “At one point I had to reach in with my finger and pull [the doughnut] back out. I was in the lead until then.”

At half-time, onetime basketball captain Damian T. Long ’00, a former missionary in Kazakhstan, said in a speech that his involvement in AIA led him to work in the central Asian country.

While AIA’s competition was sugary, its mission is wholesome. In an apparent reference to the football team’s recent disciplinary woes, event organizer David M. Silvestri 07 said AIA provides “an alternative to the kind of things you read about in The Crimson. We want to provide a way for athletes to have fun without damaging the reputation of the university.”

The winning women utilized a strategy Cutter termed “soak and switch.” Teammate Slaight added, “We let one donut soak while eating another.”

Cutter and O’Reilly honed their skills months ago at a Qdoba burrito eating contest. O’Reilly said, “We inducted Amanda [Slaight] as a secret weapon.”