Dear Molly: Thesis Love

Dear Molly,

Ever since I turned in my thesis, I have been experiencing what I like to call post-thesis depression. My thesis was my baby… I now feel lost and alone without it taking over my life and I don’t know what to do with my time or myself.

—Wistful in Winthrop

Dear Wistful,

It is only natural that you would feel a sense of loss after turning in your thesis. You spent so much time researching, writing, and editing it over the past year that it had a big part in your life. However, there were other activities that took up your time pre-thesis. Before you dive back into those, though, I suggest you undertake some quality time with the one and only Michael Bolton and his ballad, “How Am I Supposed to Live Without You.”

The chorus of this early nineties power-ballad questions, “How am I supposed to live without you, now that I’ve been loving you so long? Tell me, how am I supposed to live without you, when all that I’ve been living for is gone?” This easy listening therapy is not limited to ex-thesis writers, but can actually relate to many seniors current plights of giving up their extra-curricular commitments that they have been “loving” over the past four years. The verb “loving” could be interchanged with writing, playing, leading or any one of the other words describing the actions of graduating seniors. Moving on is hard to do…and thus mourning a bit for your old time commitments is justified.

You may want to make sure that none of your roommates are home before you experience Michael Bolton repeat hour, because you will probably be mocked relentlessly (both to your face and behind your back to everyone in your dining hall) if they hear your new love of M. Bolton. Whatever. Sometimes you just have to love your “repeat 1” setting and go with it. Turning it up loud enough to cover the taunts and laughter of your roommates may help.

Hard as it is to grasp, you can live without your thesis. It may have run your life for many months, but now it is time to pick up those activities your left by the wayside for so long. Or, if your leadership positions have all been passed on to underclassmen, create a list of things to do before you graduate that you have always wanted to do but have never had the time to actually do. Now that your thesis is turned in, you really have no excuse.

Spend a day aimlessly wandering in that large city across the river that you told all your neighbors back home was one reason why you came to Harvard in the first place. Scalp tickets outside of Fenway and seat-hop to the fourth row behind the visiting team’s dugout. Go visit the glass flowers that your mom always harasses you about seeing. Go be corny and touristy and take a Swan boat ride in the Public Gardens. If you took the Michael Bolton advice, this cannot be too corny of a suggestion.

It may hurt. It may take time. But put yourself out there again. Live senior spring to its fullest extent because you only get one, and then it is time for the real world… and unfortunately I am not speaking of the show on MTV. Don’t hide behind your stack of unreturned library books. Actually, you should return those and on the way home, swing by Senior Bar. Last Senior Standing begins tonight, and depending on how you go after that, it could very well take up all the time you used to spend thesising.

Still glad I chose not to write a thesis,

Molly



—Dear Molly runs on Mondays. Please send questions to DearMolly@thecrimson.com. Questions will be published anonymously.