The Harvard Crimson Ivy Fantasy Basketball Draft Log

Five sports editors of The Harvard Crimson recently got together to conduct the first annual Ivy Fantasy Basketball Draft. The participants include men's basketball beat writers Michael R. James '06 and Caleb W. Peiffer '07, as well as basketball enthusiasts Jonathan P. Hay '06, Pablo S. Torre '07, and Jonathan Lehman '08. The log of the draft is included below, in order to provide some analysis of the 35 selections that were made. But maybe the term "analysis" is a bit of a stretch.



CWP: Hit me with the categories again

MRJ: it's points, 3-pters made, ft-made, reb, ast, steals, blocks

CWP: Alex just suggested we retroactively include the last two Ivy League games for everybody else to solve the Penn/Princeton problem.

MRJ: nopers

MRJ: that's too easy

MRJ: it would make Goffredo the No. 1 pick

CWP: Did you just type "nopers"?

PST: ahaha

MRJ: yeah

JL: who gets first pick?

MRJ: In terms of order...I'll go last in the first round. I've typed nine numbers (1-10) into my calculator on my desk. Everyone will guess one and the order will be wherever your number appears left to right

MRJ: we're going to snake around

CWP: 7

PST: i will guess 2

JL: 9

PST: how many are we drafting?

MRJ: we will draft seven or eight

MRJ: If there still seem to be some big names after seven, we can go eight

PST: ok

JL: are we still waiting on someone

MRJ: And so far, the order is...Pablo, Lehman, Caleb, Me

PST: aaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhBOOYAH

JPH has entered the room.

JPH: sorry

JL: there we go

CWP: Jon pick a number 1-10

MRJ: no prob...you need to pick a number 1-9 and it can't be 2, 9, or 7

JPH: 4

MRJ: well done

MRJ: Jon, Pablo, Lehman, Caleb, Me

JPH: booyah

MRJ: 642895731

CWP: That was clearly rigged.

PST: yes

PST: jon is clearly sitting next to mike in person.

JPH: i've never even met mike

PST: anyway

JPH: ok, so i pick?

MRJ: umm...yeah

MRJ: you're on the clock

JPH: stehle, i suppose

CWP: Yes. Calvin Arnold is still available.

JL: i thought it was arnold calvin

PST: i will select ibrahim "jibber" jaaber.

MRJ: Going Penn on us here

MRJ: Lehman, on the clock

PST: i really wanted to say jibber jaaber

MRJ: haha...Pablo's team will be filled with nicknames and puns

MRJ: talent will merely be tangential

JL: lenny collins

PST: i hope ben "nun-" nwachukwu will remain available

MRJ: haha

JPH: ben nunchuks?

JPH: awesome

MRJ: should we have made "trading down" a rule

JPH: lets not make this more complicated than it already is

PST: yeah

PST: let us keep it simple

JL: were you laughing at my pick mike?

CWP: Uh...Cusworth.

MRJ: no laughing...I just don't know what I'm going to do

JPH: if you don’t know, what chance do i have?

MRJ: haha

MRJ: I'm going to take Mark Zoller and Jim Goffredo

JL: three of five Harvard in the first round?

MRJ: well...what can you say?

JPH: we start 3 guards and 2 forwards on a 7 person team, yes?

MRJ: yeah

JPH: thanks

MRJ: though we might go eight rounds

MRJ: if there's enough big names left

MRJ: *there are

JPH: i assume you're using "big names" in some sense that i haven't heard it used before

MRJ: **relatively big names compared to the Ivy League talent pool

PST: hahah

MRJ: I knew that wasn't going to get out in time

JPH: snuck it in there, score

MRJ: Caleb

MRJ: to you

CWP: Damn...I'll go with Gore.

MRJ: Lehman

MRJ: Caleb, I thought you were going to take Calvin Arnold

MRJ: can you honestly pass up those blocks

JL: I’ll take Baumann from Columbia

CWP: Dude I'm sweating over here...Lehman's on top of his game.

MRJ: haha

PST: and i will select Benjamin "Nun-" Nwachukwu, who turns out to be an apparently decent pick at this point.

JL: I’m in it to win it

JL: suckers

JPH: hmmmm

MRJ: that's the most Columbia talent to go in the second round, since, um, um, Marcellus Wiley?

JPH: how about "Lang" from Dartmouth and "Martin" from Yale. Do they both exist?

MRJ: haha

MRJ: you got ‘em

JPH: fantastic

CWP: Damn, I was trying to sneak Martin into the third round.

PST: i will opt to select Drew "Bringing Down the" Housman

MRJ: Pablo's just relying on Jaaber to carry him to the title

PST: perhaps.

CWP: Is Pettinella on the board?

MRJ: Nope, he's at Virginia

MRJ: practicing free throws

CWP: Sam Kaplan has assumed his honorable mantle.

JL: I’ll take Flato

MRJ: I thought Pablo was going to take Kaplan and make a Kaplan test joke

MRJ: De-Flato

PST: mike that thought honestly crossed my mind.

MRJ: He can flato-ut play

CWP: I'll take Danley.

PST: also we should all make team names.

MRJ: I'll take Noah Savage and Sam Kaplan

PST: rats

PST: i was going to take the noble savage

CWP: Jeppesen, Keenan.

MRJ: I feel like someone has to incorporate James Brown into the team name

JL: Andrew Naeve out of Cornell

MRJ: I swear the first 10 times I saw that name, I read nieve

JPH: Andrew Naeve Campbell

MRJ: haha

CWP: naive. sieve. evian.

MRJ: well, now I have no chance of seeing Naeve

MRJ: Pablo is thinking

PST: yes

MRJ: about the talent or the nickname

JPH: a good nickname is a talent

MRJ: touché

PST: i am taking Nick "good twin" Holmes

CWP: Wait, are only 5 guys "starting"? Or do all seven guys earn us points?

JPH: i was led to believe that five guys are starting

PST: or, alternately, "Sherlock," or, "what up"

MRJ: 5 guys are starting

CWP: Do some players have eligibility for both f/g then? Pretty sure Jeppeson plays SF.

MRJ: I was just going to put all 1-2-3 as guards

JL: don't try to pull some loophole stuff here Peiffer

MRJ: and 4-5 as forward

JPH: yeah, that’s what i was drafting based on

CWP: Alright, everyone just relax.

JPH: NO YOU SHUT UP

CWP: Three guards it is.

JPH: my head hurts

JPH: how about osmundson from penn and huffman from brown. are they available and do they play basketball?

MRJ: haha...they've been known to dabble

PST: "searching for" huffman

JPH: hahah

JPH: ok I’ll take them

PST: er, "waiting for"

JL: Philip Seymour Huffman

PST: i will select

JPH: huff beer man

PST: i would take Casey Hughes or something but his name is so boring

PST: so i will take Caleb "evil twin" Holmes

CWP: NOOOOOOO

JPH: haha

PST: yes.

PST: yes.

CWP: How did I let that happen?

PST: i am clearly the more knowledgeable drafter.

JPH: you got greedy, my friend.

PST: now, to find another forward...

CWP: Lehman? What you got?

MRJ: have no fear, the Big Green tandem of Calvin Arnold and Paul Bode is still on the board

JPH: hahaha

JL: I’ll take pattman

JL: unless he's hurt

JL: in which case...

MRJ: he's fine...it's just it's backcourt by committee

MRJ: he still gets plenty of minutes to score

JL: then I’ll take him

CWP: Wait is Lang on the board?

JPH: i still get plenty of minutes to score with [redacted]

PST: clubber?

JL: i pity the fool

JPH: no, i have Lang

MRJ: no, Lang was taken at the end of the second round

PST: contrary to nba regulations, [redacted] can be scored upon in under 0.3 seconds.

JPH: but the officials do have to check the video tape

CWP: I'll take Mike Beal--the Crimson starting five is now locked up.

MRJ: Ok, so I get two then

MRJ: With one, I'll take Casey Hughes

MRJ: and I'll take the hobbled Luke Ruscoe

MRJ: we're in Round 6 guys

CWP: How about Jason Hartford, majoring in hotel management at Cornell.

JL: I’ll take Becker from brown

PST: i select Scott "let's get" Friske

MRJ: good pick

MRJ: Jon's crunching the numbers

JPH: you know me too well

JPH: since he went to my high school, Mark MacDonald from Brown, and Koncz from Princeton I guess

JPH: or was that the last round...

PST: and i select calvin "hey!" arnold

MRJ: we can go around again if necessary

MRJ: we'll need your starting fives for this weekend right after this is done as well

PST: jaaber, nick holmes, caleb holmes, ben nqaakkawwuawaachuku, scott friske

CWP: Where you at Lehman?

MRJ: lehman?

JL: rourke

JL: so i have to call my team the big red

CWP: Is Luke Owings still around?

MRJ: yeah

MRJ: you want him?

CWP: Hell yeah.

MRJ: ok

PST: are we going around again?

MRJ: I'll take Justin Armstrong

MRJ: do you guys want to?

PST: I don’t feel the need

MRJ: ok then

MRJ: anyone else

CWP: We're probably good. There's always waivers!