Eight Below

Director Frank Marshall

Buena Vista Pictures

2 stars

It’s hard to imagine that a California, surfer-type stud like Paul Walker (“Into the Blue”) would be a snow guide. Yet that is the premise of the new kid-friendly Disney adventure “Eight Below.”

Based on actual events that took place in 1993, “Eight Below” is a canine-centric flick reminiscent of “Homeward Bound” and the forgettable “Snow Dogs.”

Alas, we’re left with Walker, sans any “Fast & the Furious” testosterone, and eight adorable dogs. Sadly, these dogs rival Walker in the acting department.

Walker plays the improbably named Gerry Shepherd, a guide in an Antarctic field division, traipsing across the desolate continent with a scientist (Bruce Greenwood, “Capote”) and his eight furry compatriots.

After a cataclysmic storm and a horrific accident, Shepherd and the team are forced to evacuate their base without the dogs.

From this point on the film bifurcates into two features. The first is Shepherd’s quest to find his canine companions and the second is the survival story of the dogs.

Since Walker emotes even more pitifully than Keanu Reeves, the heart of the film rests with the dogs’ struggle to return to Shepherd.

Any human with a soul can testify that nothing is more compelling than cute animals who must overcome impossible odds in the wilderness—think “Benji.”

Unfortunately, when the dogs are not on-screen, the movie is painful to stomach due to Walker’s atrocious acting and a spectacularly abysmal script.

“Eight Below” is essentially little more than a snow spectacle; an excuse for gratuitous glacial shots and heart-tugging doggy-danger sequences.

Frank Marshall, the director, is a producer extraordinaire (“Indiana Jones,” “The Bourne Supremacy”). with a shoddy directorial record: his last attempt was the disappointing Michael Crichton-inspired “Congo.”

Bottomline: The only good thing about “Eight Below” is the cute canines. Why pay to see this movie when you can just watch your own dog run around in the snow at home?

--Staff writer Jessica C. Coggins can be reached at jcoggins@fas.harvard.edu.