Fifteen Lowest Forms of Procrastination

1. Drinking a lot of water so you’ll have to pee a lot

2. Watching “Just Shoot Me”

3. Reading FM

4. Editing the Indy

5. Procrasturbation

6. Calling long-neglected family members

7. Complaining about tonight’s Brain Break. “Like, why can’t I just get a plain bagel? What’s this rock-hard thing covered in seeds?”

8. Attempting to create new emoticons: “It’s a man with a sideways question mark-shaped scar winking!”

9. “Refreshing” various websites

10. Posting your valuable thoughts on the Palestine-Israel conflict to your house open list

11. Trying to convince Tommy’s to sell a fish sandwich

12. Joining the Fox

13. Petitioning the intramural office because you suspect that the guy who rocked you in six-foot and under IM basketball was 6’1”

14. Filling out HUDS comment cards

15. Incurring debts to crank dealer