Sweet Nothing

There isn’t a fence big enough to make Harvard a good neighbor. That is where Cob Carlson and other community activists step in, campaigning against the University’s encroachment on their fair Riverside community. “Our quarrel is not with Harvard University the institution. It’s a great place and many a brilliant mind have passed through its hallowed halls,” Carlson says. “Our concern is with the Harvard Office of Planning and Real Estate, a for-profit corporation with a huge portfolio that has been wanting to build in Riverside.”

Crusading for this cause, the community members poster their lawns with righteously indignant signs. One poster in particular captures Harvard’s essence as the behemoth next door: “You can’t borrow a cup of sugar from Harvard.”

Carlson calls this campaign “effective, accurate and honest.” Is it accurate? Could Harvard cough up a cup of sugar?

FM set out for Mass. Hall to test the limits of neighborly good will.

Fifteen Minutes: Hi, I’m making some cookies upstairs, and I was wondering if I could borrow a cup of sugar from you guys.

Confused Receptionist: [Laughs.] Are you serious? I don’t have a cup of sugar.

FM: Do you know anywhere in the office that I could get a cup of sugar from?

CR: You could go across the street to CVS, or 7-Eleven. [Laughs again.] Yeah, no, we don’t have sugar here.

FM: I can’t get any sugar here? [Incredulous.]

CR: No, no. [Reprimanding tone]. It seems like you’re testing me. I don’t know who you are, but is this a joke?

FM: No ma’am. Would you say that it’s possible to get a cup, or a bag, of sugar from Harvard?

CR: You could go to the dining hall...Or to the Faculty Club. They might have sugar for you.

FM: Summers doesn’t have a big bowl of it on his desk?

CR: No, no. We have sugar packets, though.