Jerking, Not Working
Scrolling through the list of opportunities on the Student Employment Office reveals a range of possible money making gigs—babysitter, office assistant, Widener drone, and now, sperm donor. The stimulating alternative to work-study popped up on the website two-weeks ago thanks to the The New England Cryrogenic Center, located just a two-minute walk from the Kenmore Square T-stop.
When asked about her decision to place the advertisement in the SEO’s job listings, Director of Student Employment Martha Homer replied, “Five years ago, I wouldn’t have done it. But I think that in this day and age, students are smart enough to know that it’s their own choice.” Homer explained that she discussed the issue with her co-workers, who reassured her that sperm donation was a very legitimate and legal way of earning money. “But I would not place an advertisement for egg donors,” Homer added.
Considering the market value of eggs, the thousands of dollars students could make off the donation would seem out of place among the hourly-wage jobs listed on the SEO website. Of course, sperm donation pays pretty well too. At $70 a shot with up to eight visits per month, a hard worker can earn upwards of $5,000 within a year—if he has the stamina to keep it up for that long.
Not a bad deal, right? Well, there happens to be more to it than that. Christopher Arnone, contact for the sperm donation program at the NECC, explains the process of becoming a sperm donor. The procedure is not that unlike applying to college. First, the potential donor must fill out an application, answering questions ranging from educational background to frequency of marijuana usage. Then comes the interview portion of the process, followed by a physical examination and a blood test; and at last, for the really strong candidates, comes a second medical interview and some final paperwork. Arnone comments that the NECC runs one of the strictest screening processes for sperm donor candidates, generally admitting only one out of every 20 to 25 applicants. How’s that for competition?
Although the job may seem like easy money, sperm donation does not appeal to everybody. “The idea of giving sperm to a stranger, especially when accepting money for it, seems morally questionable, and conceptually just makes me uncomfortable,” says Michael Murphy ‘03. Nevertheless, Arnone estimates that he has received at least ten serious inquiries from Harvard students in the past week alone. So ladies, before you accept that date with that guy from moral reasoning section, think about what you’re agreeing to—he might be a daddy.