Get Chaste or Chased

A naked angel sits seductively with her hands hidden between her thighs. Her wings are spread, engulfing the moon that
By W. L. Adams

A naked angel sits seductively with her hands hidden between her thighs. Her wings are spread, engulfing the moon that passes her chariot of clouds. Her long hair dangles past two supple breasts as she curves her neck upward and whispers seductively “It’s been a whole year since Debauchery...” So read the hot pink posters spread throughout Winthrop House that advertised last Saturday’s “Chastity” dance, a derivative of the infamous “Debauchery.” Tom Dow`03 recounts last year’s scandalous event. “You couldn’t move. It was disgusting. You had to push through sweaty, nasty bodies to get anywhere. There were people dancing on the food-checker line. It was out of control in a bad way. People got physically hurt.” In addition, alcohol served in the House courtyard intoxicated partygoers who then clogged bathroom sinks with vomit. “You couldn’t wash your hands. It was just ridiculous,” Dow remembers.

Winthrop’s House Committee (HoCo) gave the dance a facelift to clean up its scandalous image and to affect more universal appeal. President Alana E. Murphy`02 addressed the dance in a recent e-mail to Winthrop residents stating, “Everyone is welcome to Chastity. I hear that there are people who were hesitant to come to Debauchery in the past. While some people will probably be debaucherous, it is in no way required of people.”

Regardless of the new name, debauchery was certainly encouraged. A table of condoms preached safe sex while simultaneously hinting at chance encounters. Bottles of whip cream oozed kinkiness as layers of a cool smoke hid the sticky floor. A curtain replete with a strobe light illuminated the silhouettes of nasty dancers while onlookers grinded to Britney and Destiny’s Child.

And they grinded with Lil’ Kim too. Mike A. Hill `02 made an appearance as the “bad-ass chick from the Moulin Rouge.” As he explained, “The theme was simple, Lil’ Kim comes to a Harvard dance. Bearing in mind the ‘chaste’ theme,” he continued, “I wore thigh-high fuck-me boots with the nothing-but-slit-skirt, a subtle but effective ensemble combining unadulterated innocence and attitude.”

In past years, play money distributed at the party’s entrance facilitated hook-ups. Rather than wasting time courting potential mates, or even finding out their names, party-goers would use money as a common sexual currency. Not this year. As Murphy explained “Our masters and tutor staff had some problems with the theme—the idea that people only came to this to be debaucherous, and the whole aspect of ‘play prostitution.’” Hours before the dance, however, packets of this money reading, “It Ain’t No Fun...If My Homies Can’t Have None,” mysteriously appeared under the doors of residents who payed their House dues. HoCo has identified the culprit, but his or her identity remains a secret.

And so Chastity’s naked angel rides her cloud sporting a halo tarnished by scandal. Her coy looks cannot hide her true nature as a lascivious beast. As Fifi Cobas`04 concluded, “I have a boyfriend, and hooking up with another guy was not a possibility for me. But the two friends that I went with fared quite well. There were some really sketchy guys in the market for free ass, and in general Chastity was as debaucherous as expected.”

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