Lesser-Known Installations

This week, Larry Summers prepares for his installation as Harvard president, a spectacle to feature bread and circuses, pomp and paegentry, and several extra loaves of bread for the big guy.

FM’s crack investigative staff takes an unflinching look at other installations occuring across the Harvard campus—and beyond!!!

Eliot C-52: After a long wait, resident Jordana R. Lewis ’02 called the superintendant to get the bulb in her common room replaced.

20 DeWolfe 38: Digital cable was finally installed in the bedroom of Keith M. Radford ’02. This installation featured a reading by former poet laureate Robert Pinsky, a choral rendition of “10,000 Men of Harvard,” and a rerun of The Facts of Life in which Tootie eats a danish.

Winthrop J-44: Resident Jack P. Riccobono ’03 finally installed his computer. He can now check e-mail on his own computer, rather than mine. Not yet installed: my other roommate’s computer.

Adams E-21: Felix P. Johnson ’03 is going to install deez. Deez what? “Deez nutz!”

Quincy 314: The kitchen-in-a-box set purchased by Virginia L. Hazel ‘03 was unwrapped and its knives, forks and spoons placed in separate compartments in the same drawer. News media repesentatives from 80 countries and four packs of oriental-style ramen applied for press credentials to observe the festivities.

10614 Wadsworth Ct., Fort Wayne, IN: The parents of Ben D. Mathis-Lilley ‘03 get long-distance telephone service installed in their new home. This installation is accompanied by a 100-piece marching band, giant “Veritas” banners and AT&T service representative “Gary.”

Mather 137: Itinerant bum/boyfriend Adam S. Cohen ’01 finally returned to his parents’ house in Madison, Wisconsin. Humming “She Bangs,” Frances G. Tilney ’02 installed the life-size Ricky Martin poster she’d been keeping in her closet for a month.