Beirut All-Stars

With the popularity of baseball cards in decline, FM has decided to change the game a little and debut a set of Beirut All-Star Trading Cards. Gone are the batting averages and runs batted in, the silly pictures of overweight men in tight tight pants, and the Barbie doll pink bubble gum. Beirut is a much simpler game. Each game requires two stoic players battling for no real reason except the need to get tipsy, a tiny white ball, a long crusty table and the will to win.

Isaac “Ziggy” Whitman ‘04

Position: Shooter

Date of Birth: 6/7/80

Place of Birth: Philadelphia, PA

Key Stat: Averages 7 cups a game.

Did you know: “Ziggy” once made two cups in one shot. Wow!

Kelly Lange ‘04

Position: Distracter

Date of Birth: 10/7/80

Place of Birth: Bryn Mawr, PA

Key Stat: Makes a shooter miss an average of 4 shots a game.

Did you know: Kelly is so good, she sometimes distracts herself.

Kate McFarlin ‘03

Position: Blower

Date of Birth: 5/4/80

Place of Birth: Naples, FL

Key Stat: Averages 3 rim blows a game.

Did you know: Kate practices religiously to keep up her form.

Eustace Santa Barbara ‘04

Position: Closer

Date of Birth: 1/18/79

Place of Birth: London, England

Key Stat: Wins 75% of redemptions.

Did you know: Eustace is from England, home of other Beirut allstars, Iggy Pop, Baby Spice and the Queen Mum.