U-Hall Takeover: Take 2

When Dean of Students Archie C. Epps III retired after last semester, Harvard announced his administrative position would go with him. In its infinite wisdom, the College lost a man whose central concern was aiding student groups that had little money and less space and replaced him with three associate deans, each with a cushy salary and cozy office. Last week, in a seemingly unrelated move, a group of librarians announced their dissatisfaction with University plans to move them to a newly acquired building in Central Square. I'm with the librarians--bookworms belong with books--but the opportunities offered by this new Central Square building are too important to pass up. The connection is clear: move the deans to Central Square and convert University Hall to a student center.

Like real estate, the three most important attributes in a student center are location, location, location. What better utilizes University Hall's central location: administrative pencil-pushing and phone calls or student parleys and performances? The Progressive Student Labor Movement won't have to storm University Hall if they're already there, while the Undergraduate Council could salute the flag outside and then demonstrate their democratic fervor within. IGP could improvise in the basement and HRTV could broadcast on the roof. After a century as a two-thousand-pound prop for The Man, the John Harvard statue would finally stand for students, first and foremost.

Another obvious benefit of the move would be vastly increased space for student groups--three long floors of plush offices worth of it. Small organizations like the Harvard Anim Society could take over the desks of staff assistants, medium-sized organizations like Demon Magazine the offices of mid-level coordinators and large organizations like Harvard Model Congress the space now squandered on deans. "The ballooning in the number of groups in recent years has left three out of four without office space," The Crimson reported last spring. "Others are in spaces drastically inadequate for their needs." Shift the administration to Central Square, and student groups will live large at last.

For a brief time last semester, the U.C. pledged $25,000 toward the funding of a new student center, the largest single allocation of council founds ever. By contrast, moving the deans one stop down the Red Line would be free save the cost of new business cards, address labels and stationery. For six months, the post office will even forward their mail.

With a University Hall student center ideal in location, space and cost, the only remaining concern is how the deans would survive in Central Square. As far as I can tell, the duties of a dean are calling people and answering calls, reading and writing reports, eating at the Faculty Club and attending College fundraisers. All but the last two can be accomplished with ease in Central Square, and I'm sure that in exchange for a student center the Undergraduate Council would be more than happy to sponsor a special dean shuttle bus.

All aboard!

Jeremy N. Smith '00, a Crimson editor, is a history and literature concentrator in Pforzheimer House. He is the former president of Demon Magazine.