I Want My TV

They live within Harvard's television-saturated culture, but they do not sing along with their roommate's CD of "Hit TV Theme Songs of the 80s." They ask "Scoobie Who?" They cannot imitate Michael Jackson's dance from "Thriller." No, they aren't aliens. They don't even come from "Third Rock" or the X-Files. They are ordinary students, with one key difference: they are the television deprived.

"We had a rule that I couldn't watch television unless I knew what show was on and what time it was on. I couldn't just turn on the TV. So I only ended up watching about three shows a week," said Velma M. McEwan '00. To make up for it, McEwan used to reenact "MacGyver" episodes. Vanessa P. Bertozzi '00 remembers her deprived childhood as a time of necessary duplicity. "My older sister, older brother and I had to sneak TV when our parents went out. We'd listen for the car coming up the driveway and then run up and turn it off. Under supervision, we were only allowed to watch nature programs and operas," Bertozzi says. Apparently Don Giovanni can't sustain the interest of American children.

Yet McEwan and Bertozzi's childhoods were more privileged than some--there are Harvard students whose families did not own a television during their formative years. Maria D. Bradley-Moore '99 is one such student. "My father thought if we had one, he'd watch it all the time, and my mother reinforced [his decision]. She thought it was a good educational strategy," Bradley-Moore says. Her roommate, Sarah B. Jacoby '99, a Crimson editor, also grew up in a television-free household. "It was stolen Christmas Eve when I was two and we never got another one," Jacoby says.

The roommates' common lack of TV background did not influence their decision to room together, but growing up without TV does affect the lives, liberties and happinesses of those who have to endure the experience. Bertozzi expresses a deep-seated bitterness toward her little sister, who did not suffer the same restrictions she and her older siblings did. "I think it often happens that parents just give up with the youngest child," Bertozzi huffs. "The rest of the family would be at the dinner table, and she would be sitting in front of the TV, eating Lucky Charms! I couldn't join her, because by that time, I had too much fucking school-work." Sibling rivalry, American style.

For many, the most painful aspect of television deprivation is the cultural ignorance it produces. "When I was younger, it was traumatizing," laments Bradley-Moore. "It so mattered. Every first grader had the latest on `Little House [on the Prairie]' except me. My vocabulary was behind everyone else's, and my teachers wondered if it was because I never watched TV. It made me feel weird; the last thing you want in first grade is to feel weird." An anonymous (afraid of being stigmatized?) Lowell House senior concurs. "When I was a little kid, [not watching television] was hard because that's the way to have some-thing in common with people," he says.

On the other hand, Jacoby downplays the need for a television set. She explains that "you're a little culturally illiterate, I guess, but television's everywhere. People think that if you don't have a TV, you don't have electricity and you've never seen `Sesame Street,' when, in fact, you do have electricity and you have seen `Sesame Street'. It's really not that big a deal."

Nor is television's omnipresence the only saving grace for the television deprived. Bertozzi and Bradley-Moore both cite reading as a cherished childhood pasttime. Moreover, both students believe that their parents' restrictions benefited them in the long run by fostering a love of reading. "I think school is geared toward people who have read a lot," says Bradley-Moore. Bertozzi adds, "I'm glad my parents did it, because now I just kind of see through television. Commercials just roll me. Now, there are some programs that I think are really worthwhile, like "The Simpsons"--the Simpsons are the lifeblood of America--but most of it is just a waste of time."

But perhaps the most telling validation of television deprivation is that Bradley-Moore and Jacoby both plan to follow their parents' lead, though with modifications. When she gets older, Jacoby says that she will probably have a VCR and a television, but no cable or antenna. Even "Must-See TV" is not something she really sees the need for. Bradley-Moore muses, "The big question is going to be if I have one when I get married and have kids. I think maybe I'll just get one for myself and put a lock on it and let them watch `Sesame Street' if they ask. It would be cool if I could invent some-thing that would control certain channels coming on at certain times of day, so I could control what my kids were watching."