Neon Kudzu

Final Club Hijinks

In Dunster House, final club pranks aren't a common phenomenon. If someone's hair is dyed an unnatural color, if he's wearing something unusually short or disturbingly long, you stop noticing after a while. Beyond the dark oak of the walls, there aren't too many vestiges of Harvard Past.

Have lunch in Lowell, you get a different picture of life at Harvard. Final club members live in Lowell--final club members and people in the process of the punch. It's not something you notice all the time, but these moments of final club initiations remind usDunster types that there's another side to life at Harvard--a side that includes hazing. In weeks like these, we rediscover the existence of the genteel old boys network.

Oh, look, you think as you wait for a self-service scoop of cauliflower au gratin. The gentleman in front of you on line is wearing a ski mask. How quaint. However will he use his fork and knife? Oh, what does it matter. These ingenious Harvard men will always find a way.

Exit the Lowell courtyard and stroll into the Yard, and you're again reminded of our intrepid final club brothers. Ah, me. A young man runs up the steps of the library, carrying a keg atop his head. He's made it to the top, and is sounding a barbaric yawp! Hurrah! Three cheers for the old boys!

For a mere Radcliffe girl hidden away in Dunster, unaccustomed to the glories and thrills of final club life, these hazing days seem puzzling. I might even venture to say "stupid." But it's the old boys network, so I'm not expected to understand. Just feel secure that high paying, well-connected jobs await the man in the mask and the Keg King.