Baseball on the Gridiron

The days are getting shorter; the leaves are fast falling from the trees; it's colder outside; and stores are already putting up their Christmas decorations. It's definitely October--almost November, in fact.

But something is wrong here: They're actually playing baseball. Now, for those of you who don't know, baseball is a summer sport. It's meant to be played on warm, sunny afternoons when you can take a picnic lunch to the field, soak up some sun and cheer on your favorite team.

But how can you do all that when it's snowing outside and frostbite has incapacitated your fingers? For that matter, how can you expect the players to perform when they have to stand around in an open field wearing skimpy knicker uniforms?

This year's championship series--known as the Stanley Cup Face-Off--started in New York. However, it was so cold there that they had to move the later games--the face-off goes on until one team has a two-game lead--to Los Angeles, where it's always like summer and everyone could pretend it was August again. But then, the smog got to them, so they moved the tournament back to New York. All this was possible because of the low air fares you can get now between New York and Los Angeles.

The main problem with playing baseball in New York in October--almost November--when it's cold is that people don't like to suffer through four quarters, sitting in freezing stands, watching some underdressed men stand around on the oval waiting for a puck to come their way. How can you expect fans to show up when their minds are probably on skiing and ice skating? In Los Angeles, they didn't have those problems because the weather is always nice. You could play baseball in January for all they'd care.

Despite my aversion to watching baseball in inclement weather. I went to a game in October once. It was several years ago in Chicago, when the Bears were playing the St. Louis Post-Dispatches at Comiskey Field. I spent most of the game wrapped up in a blanket sipping hot cocoa, and I only remember one play. It came in the third inning. The Bears quarterstop threw a long pass, which they call a missile, to one of the left-fielders, who crossed the finish line into the "n"-zone for a home run to win the game. But everyone was too cold to cheer.

What this goes to show is that when baseball is played in October, the fans aren't interested because their thoughts are elsewhere--on ice fishing, for example--and the hearty ones who do show up are much too cold to be enthusiastic. All this combines to reduce player morale. The only way to remedy this sad situation is to stop playing baseball in October. The next thing you know, they'll be playing football in August.