Boring

You want to hear this amazing thing my pre-med roommate told me last week? Here it is. Take any triangle; assume it's a right triangle for simplicity's sake. OK. Now, measure one of the sides of the triangle you've taken. Now measure the other side. Now multiply the length of the first side you took by itself. Now do the same with the second side. OK. Now measure the third side. OK, now you've made a clean sweep, measuring-wise. Now, multiply the measurement of the third side by itself. (Oh, by the way, make sure the third side you take is the longest side--that's the only "catch.") Now, add up the first two "squares." Compare them with the third "square" you have, and compare the difference. The difference is how smart you are (your "IQ") for doing this in the first place. Besides, I was only kidding about my roommate; he's studying to be a dentist.

You know--all the venom has drained from me this week; I think I'll just let the above parable stand by itself, and let you come running back for more and better abuse next week. This week, it's just the same old boring array of silly rock concerts; I write about them, you rarely go to them.

"FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE PLEASE: Iggy Pop will be appearing at the Orpheum Theater on Oct. 14 in Boston. With the release of Iggy's second lp-(sic) "Lust for Life" on RCA records, we find confirmed judgement (sic) in knowing he's defined his stature as 'Godfather of Punk Rock' quoted by many critics (sic). But as this lp and tour may prove 'Is there Rock after Punk?'." (sic, sic, sic, sic, sic, sic, sic, sic.) What you just read is the kind of sleazy prose that I have to slodge through every week-and I don't make a cent off this directly--to let you know just what's happening in the world of people who put chicken bones through their noses and never use deodorant only occasionally incense.

Tell me, wouldn't you hang it up after a while?

Iggy, Robin Trower, Thin Lizzy, James Montogomery, John Mayall, Nils Lofgren, Stuff, Jerry Jeff, Rock and Roll Rescuscitation, and David Bromberg are still just as scheduled this week as they were last week.

In addition, a combined chorale of Cambridge City Councilors, local businessmen (including Tommy), firemen, and professors emeritus will perform the "extended play" version of the smash-movie-theme song/rock-ballad "You Light Up My Life" on the steps of Widener Library on the Harvard University campus on any given Sunday. (Ha.) (A: The Pythagorean theorem; upper right molars (part A), prophylaxis (part B).))).).).

Have a nice Dartmouth weekend, and, if you're from Harvard, have a nice Dartmouth weekend.

Anyway, have a nice weekend, Dartmouth or otherwise! Sooner or Later,