Savoir-Faire

[reprinted from the 1976 edition of the Brown Alumni Magazine]

Once upon a time, back in the days when there was taxation without representation and people rebelled over sugar and stamps, a group of well-meaning Baptists founded one Rhode Island College in Warren, R.I.

Six years later, in 1770, the name of the college was changed to Brown University, in recognition of the contributions of one Nicholas Brown.

As the years passed, Brown became recognized as one of the leading academic institutions in the entire nation. Maintaining a strong tradition of dedication to both undergraduate and graduate education, Brown's illustrious history has witnessed a constant expansion and adaptation of academic programs to encompass expanding spheres of knowledge.

Along about 1878, Brown decided to take up football. It lost its lone contest that season (to Amherst), a game which pretty much set the pattern for Bruins football for the next 95 years or so.

It's not, you see, that Brown never had winning football seasons, it's just that nobody seems to remember them. The only thing which people recall is that since the formation of the Ivy football league in 1956, the Bruins have been, for the most part, somewhat less than pitiful.

Until 1973, they had but four winning seasons, just one between 1959 and 1972, and then John Anderson entered the picture. Anderson not only revitalized the entire program, but he did so with such swiftness afoot that when the Bruins pulled off three consecutive winning seasons in 1973, '74 and '75, the entire city of Providence was declared in a state of shock.

But this, however, is where our story takes on a sad conclusion, for despite this recent turnabout, Brown has fallen just short of the ultimate--the Ivy title.

Last year, Harvard traveled to Providence and before the largest crowd in Bruin history, as well as a regional television audience, embarassed the home folks, 45-26.

And then this season, Brown entered the Crimson contest with its best record (5-1) ever, and for the second year in a row, Harvard ruined the party, this time by an incredible 8 touchdowns. Immediately following the game, the Brown University trustees announced that henceforth and forevermore, their school would be abandoning its football program on the grounds that "Nicholas would have wanted it this way. If we can't finish first, then we no longer want to finish at all."

And with that, the 98-year history of Brown football was complete. For more information on this truly sad tale, please contact the Brown Sports Information Office at 401-863-2219.

*****

With the fearlessness of one who has eaten a "Beat the House" breakfast at Tommy's Lunch, here are this week's winners, er, picks:

CORNELL at YALE--Picking this game is not as easy as it looks. It's easier. Yale 25, Cornell 7.

COLUMBIA at DARTMOUTH--At the outset of this season, the Lions appeared on the road to respectability, but injuries and the retirement of a top running back have turned that road into a blasting zone. Today, Dartmouth (with its new nickname, the Woodsmen) does the blasting. Dartmouth 36 (and counting), Columbia 4.

PENN at PRINCETON--Now this one is genuinely tough. A Tiger victory would mean a 3-2 record heading into Yale and Dartmouth the next two weekends, which wouldn't sit too badly with the alumni, while a Quaker triumph would mean a chance to finish ahead of Princeton in the final standings. Heads say Princeton, tails Penn. It's spinning, it's still spinning, it's, it's heads (but just barely). Princeton 19, Penn 16.

BROWN at HARVARD--The Crimson has gone down to the wire in the last year with just about everybody who counts. Everybody, that is, but one, and that one is here this afternoon. So here's a vote for 1975 revisited. Harvard 52, Brown 9.

Last week: 5 right, 0 wrong.

Season's record: 26 right, 5 wrong (.839, but you better check that long division).