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Harvard Girls Beef About the Beef And Resist Being Contented Cows

By Michael J. Barrett

Summer School boys, before reading this you had better sit down, and take deep, even breaths. Try to relax. Boys... boys, the summer girls don't love you. Many don't even like you.

I know. It's hard to believe. Things were looking so fine. But now you know the way the things are looking back at you. The main problem is, you act too young. And the food or the city or the summer or something has touched a good number of you with lunacy.

As one engaging girl from Brooklyn put it, "I expected guys who would be socially older, experienced individuals. But the buoys are so awkwud here." This girl felt disgusted because the other day some guy tossed a paper plane past her nose, with a request for a date written on it. And in the Yard, other boys have sent friends over to her, to mediate for them.

Two Wheaton girls lament, "We seem to have met the wrong males. They have been too shy or silly."

"In fact," said one of them, her eye-brows batting in amazement, "last night we were sitting around and a guy came up and said, 'Do you want hear me moo?' and he began mooing, and hee-hawing! Then he said, 'Look at the beautiful birds in the trees,' and he began chirping at me!"

Such examples aside, the feminine consensus holds that a maturity gap separates the sexes. And some females complain that the boys are too intelligent to be fun, which probably says more about the girls than the guys.

Of course, a lot of exceptions to the consensus exist, but almost every girl who beamed and said, "I've met some fabulous fellows here," admitted that these types were hard to find. As a rule, they don't saunter around Harvard Yard.

Of course, all complaints need not be taken to heart. One lovely European girl sadly said, "I was quite surprised by all the Bermuda shorts; I'm not used to so many boys' legs. They are not very elegant to see."

But guys, for the most part, you should pay attention to your critics. It may be a long hot summer, and what the women want is a little cool. Take at least one bit of advice--stop mooing. Is that too much to ask?

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