This Scoffs at Training Rules Before Dital Tilt

WASHINGTON, D. C., April 29--(APE)--One of the stormiest legal disputes in year threatened to tear the Supreme Court apart tonight as Justice Felix Frankfurter, former southpaw mound ace, threatened to resign from the nation's highest tribunal in protest of Chief Justice Vinson's ruling Thursday that Lionel "The Toy" Train was unconstitutional and could not play in yesterday's classic, won by the Crimson 23 to 2.

(The dispute arose when Train jumped to the Junior League, along with Junior Stephens, Steven McNally, Rand McNally, Sally Rand, Sally Keith, and Keith Memorial.)

Frankfurter, speaking from a low crouch, cited the famous Colorado vs. Wyoming case (1922) to back up his point. "I might also mention stare decisis, ex parcel post, and hic haec hoe."

Vinson, whose, judgment Thursday throw the Poonsters into a deep quandry, was unavailable for comment last night. "I have nothing to say," he alleged. "No comment.

Justice Burton was solidly behind his colleague. "I used to play some ball my self, and I think Lionel is one of the hottest prospects in years. It shouldn't happen to any ballplayers--for they are the last of our clean, healthy, upstanding American youth in this day of dissipation."

Meanwhile, in Cambridge, Mass., home of the annual titanic, reports from Still-man Infirmary indicated that all was not well in the Lampoon camp. Apparently suffering from an overdoes of a mysterious oriental drug, the Poonsters were lying on beds of pair tonight. "We were tricked,' groaned Oliveyl Q"isling, relief hurler. "I suspect Deceitful Cockatoo of feeding the team some poisoned rhubarbs at the game."