Crimson Cringes As 'Poonsters Double-Deal

Once Leo Durocher had a horse playing center field for Brooklyn. Today history may repeat itself.

Squaring his phalanxes for the annual Crime-Lampy diamond monsoon this afternoon, funnymanager Georgie (Bloop-Bleep) Blimpton revealed at the twenty-third hour last night that he had signed on a two-headed goat for double duty in the infield.

Remembering last year's 23 to 2 massacre at the hands of the resurgent scribes, Blimpton disclosed that he had foraged the monster during a recent sortie into Widener Library. "He'll be great for double-headers," winked the musty old Dutch Tiler, as his rookie phenom masked a fast quadruple take behind a two-faced goatee.

Stunned, Schmunned

Crimson Samplesize S. Haudmedown was stunned by the news that his athletes would lock horns with a quadruped, but busy-manager Prenticemake (Sad) Sack guaranteed he'd get the goat. Commissioner Chandler could not be reached for comment.

Meanwhile the Bow Street birdcage was shaken by the sudden illness of perennial hurler Clem Woop, stricken with an acute attack of two-line gagging. "I've got the inside track now," smirked Lionel (The Toy) Train, roundhouse-righthander, who vowed he had never been cornered.

Odds, Schmodds

Local haberdashers set wavering odds from 2 to 23 in favor of the pullet pulitzers, depending on the availability of antique fireballer R. Sibley (The Cat) Ludendorff, currently nursing a soggy-salary wing on the eve of the morning after.

Final blessings were bestowed last night upon the eager young athletes by snowthatched Buller J. Baugham haA, who concluded:

"For when that One Great Scorer comes

To write against your name,

He cares not that you won or lost,

But how you played the game."