Big Woop Machine Rolls in Bow Polls

Only three newcomers to the notorious politics of Cambridge's Poon Ring survived elections yesterday, as cigarsmoking, derby-hatted Clemens B. Woop VI tightened his grasp over the lives of the Bow Street slum sections. In the traditional first-thirteenth in November recount, Woop carried all two electoral districts, dropping only 23 to his pawky opponent.

Riding the crest with their leader were "Fat Frank" Golet, K. Cceedric Robinson, "Darlin' Dickie" Prescott, and Jimeee Scanlon.

Backed by the CCA and other citizen's groups, Jacques L. Ctoreador, Collie Ollie Iollie, and Richard "Muscles" Muscles (Muscles) cracked the tight hierarchy and immediately signed with Boss Woop.

Said Woop last night when conceded the election. "Recount? 'Smecount."