Home Run Hitter Y' May Be But We're Puritans, Said He

A friend of ours several times removed decided that there was nothing Ted Williams had that he didn't have but a 336 lifetime batting average. In a fervent burst of House patriotism, he cut his afternoon class and panted down to Soldiers Field to shag flies for the Adams House nine.

No banjo hitter he, our Gold Coast Gehringer slapped out screaming line drives with which he interspersed sparkling gems of fielding prowess. Amidst the plaudits of his teammates, he cried, "For God, for country, and for Adams." "Adams, Hell, We're From Winthrop House." He leaves for Mexico City tomorrow.