So I Stands Up and Yells--Is There an Earmuff About?

Dear Editor:

Maybe you can help me. Frankly, I'm desperate. Does virtue have no reward? I'm a good boy, see. I never stay up all night for an exam because I haven't studied. All term I do my assignments on time, and prepare for at least two days before each exam. I always get a good night's sleep and have a clear head in the morning. I take two fountain pens, and three well-sharpened pencils, just in case.

But what good does it do me? Last Friday I ran up to Memorial Hall to take my exam in Physics. I just sunk my teeth into the juiciest problem you ever saw, when "Bang Bang, Bwrrr-Bwrrr?Bwrrr," Cambridge starts drilling holes in Cambridge Street outside. After three-quarters of an hour of this, they carted me away to Stillman in a shoebox, kicking and screaming. I'm calm now, but I've got three more exams this week.