Pass the Custard Pie, Mac; The Keystone Cops are Back

Here I am, a dishevelled liberal arts student racing up to register before 4 o'clock, with a bottle of booze in my bag, when I bumps into this guy. He's got a flashy blue uniform on, and loads of gold braid, so I pick myself up and snap to attention, who knows, it might be an admiral. Only it's not an admiral, it's Al Roach, the Yard Cop. "They're mobilizing us," he says. "Gave us uniforms for the first time in 308 years. Don't ask me why, maybe it's protective concealment with all these Navy men in the Yard." It's all very fine, all Colonel Apted ever had man a water piston.