News

Adams Alumni Go Nuts for Newly Renovated House

News

A Better Cambridge Announces Endorsements in City Council Race, Giving Boost to Incumbents

News

HUA Kicks Off With Inaugural Meeting Under New Administration

News

Harvard Ends Undergraduate Minority Recruitment Program as Trump Targets Race in Admissions

News

Memorial Church Reduces Programming Amid University Budget Cuts

U.S. Steals Window Screens From Insect-ridden College

NO WRITER ATTRIBUTED

As gnats, wasps, mosquitoes, and flies once again wage their mite-y spring offensive, penetrating deep into students' rooms, the retreating inmates are raising the perennial cry of "Why don't they give us some screens?"

Little do they know that the University has already conceded their demands, and has made enough of the metal meshes for every House room between Mass. Ave. and the Charles. They were stacked in the Maintenance Shops ready for summer use.

But the glint of the copper bug-barriers caught the metal-hungry eye of Army men commandeering vital materials for industry, and the screens were melted up. Veterans of past insect wars recommend mosquito-netting canopies for the beds of those who would sleep in peace.

Want to keep up with breaking news? Subscribe to our email newsletter.

Tags