News
Harvard Medical School Cancels Student Groups’ Pro-Palestine Vigil
News
Former FTC Chair Lina Khan Urges Democrats to Rethink Federal Agency Function at IOP Forum
News
Cyanobacteria Advisory Expected To Lift Before Head of the Charles Regatta
News
After QuOffice’s Closure, Its Staff Are No Longer Confidential Resources for Students Reporting Sexual Misconduct
News
Harvard Still On Track To Reach Fossil Fuel-Neutral Status by 2026, Sustainability Report Finds
In a fitting climax to a busy season of publicity-seeking, members of the Lampoon, college temperance organ, set fire to their fortress and turned in a 4-11 alarm to the Cambridge fire department on Thursday night.
Expecting to see thousands of curious citizens attracted to the scene of the configuration, President E. C. K. "Peggy" Read was disappointed at the small turnout. Posters advertising their latest issue had been glued to the walls of the building, but only a few by-standers noticed the garish broadsides.
Treads on Bottle
Two fire engines arrived at the scene in time to discover small wisps of smoke curling out of the basement window of the Lampoon building. Upon entering the cellar, the smoke-eaters quickly stamped out the blaze. The only casualty suffered occurred when one of the firemen stepped on a discarded gin bottle, slipped, and fell on a beer-can opener.
The fire was reported by Ibis Henry Hayes, who told police that he had been rudely awakened by the smell of smoke. After opening up the cellar for the first time since an Advocate editor was sealed up in the cubicle 16 years ago, Hayes found the blaze.
Suspect Arson
Insurance agents who examined the location of the fire hinted arson, but contemplated no action because of the little damage done. Police were inclined to think that the fire had resulted from spontaneous combustion originating from the organization's library of ancient jokebooks, which are removed from the cellar only eight times a year.
Want to keep up with breaking news? Subscribe to our email newsletter.