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Doubtless Phi Beta Kappa men are fully aware that they alone are capable of saving the helpless rest of civilization from accidental suicide, but they have certainly been incredibly listless about doing it. So far, all they have accomplished has been in the line of rallies featuring the clarion call of intellectualism and reiterating that the world will be much safer when it is entirely in their hands.
At one of these rallies, called recently in New York, Dean Gauss of Princeton admitted that the Society had, it was true, taken rather poor care of civilization, but announced that he, personally, was fully ready to start work in earnest, and hoped others would follow. "Science, humanity have already suffered too much through suppression of freedom of inquiry to make any policy of appeasement possible. . . . On that issue we hereby declare war," he said. But although Phi Beta Kappa men thrilled to the campaign title, "To the Defense," they found it hard to know just where to start in on the business of rescuing the world from destruction. It was agreed at length to begin by doing away with all "isms." That should be easy enough. But before that job could be attended to, something had to be done about the gold standard. Ever since the U. S. Government increased the price of gold, the Phi Beta Kappa Society had been losing money hand over fist on its gold Key, whose cost remained unchanged, although its gold content was reduced. To cover this deficit, and also incidentally to pay for an intellectual freedom campaign on the side, the Society was found to be in need of $300,000. And while the world felt itself rolling nearer and nearer the edge of eternity, the Phi Beta Kappa Society again was forced to admit that it was bound hand and foot, and could do nothing about it.
Somehow or other, the human race is managing to survive the close call, but now long it can stave off the fatal day is uncertain. It is time for the intelligentsia to realize its responsibilities. Civilization must be left to its own devices no longer. It is up to Phi Beta Kappa men to recognize their Key as the wise man's burden, which is altogether too ponderous to dangle from a mere watchchain, and altogether too potent to have no other use.
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