Hoeing Wards Off Amazed Muskrat With Stick Until Yard Cops Aid Him in Making Slaughter

A mighty hunter before the Lord was Nimrod, but his laurels have been seriously challenged by Daniel Crockett Hoeing, History 1's ace of of aces, for early yesterday morning he came upon a muskrat prowling up and prowling down the Yard.

With his usual audacity, Mr. Hoeing held it off with a stick until two Yard cops helped him down the amazed animal. Leaving it dead and headless, he retired to Holworthy, the proud possessor of the bloody token of his prowess.

Stalks His Prey

It was while Mr. Hoeing was walking by Stoughton and Hollis that he smelled a rat and began to stalk his prey just as his illustrious ancestors in colonial days. Only a few half-awake Freshmen raised their heads to watch their doughty proctor encounter the animal with his stick.

Questioned as to the truth of the affair, the Yard warriors vaingloriously admitted complete responsibility for the conquest, but Mr. Hoeing, gallant as always, declined to contradict their statements. "I understand it was a stirring struggle" was all this unsung hero could be persuaded to say.

Termed Primeval

Sportsmen last night agreed that this achievement has the edge on last spring's skunk posse led by Colonel Apted. While certain biological features made the latter accomplishment more deadly to its perpetrators and spectators, the Colonel had to resort to two fearsome six-shooters before the partially defenceless animal dropped dead at sunset. Mr. Hoeing, on the other hand, might have been a caveman, for he encountered the late rat in truly primeval fashion.

Whether or not the beast will be stuffed, preserved, and mounted in the Union depends on the modesty of its assassin. To aid him in his decision there are two courses of action open to Freshmen, a petition or a Memorial Society meeting. The former is more likely to appeal to ebullient Freshmen.