RACKETY-RAX

Professor Owen hit the head-lines last night, not by killing his grandmother with a sash-weight, not by becoming Governor of Massachusetts, not by inventing a perpetual motion machine, but, very simply, by alleging a spectacular untruth to be true.

Bob Haley, said Professor Owen of M.I.T., Harvard football captain who was deposed a few months ago, would still have a place on the team and his post as captain if it were not for the fact that another college "set out to show up" the situation which Harvard authorities had known well for years.

Well, if the newspapers cannot find any news tomorrow, let the Crimson help them out. We'll say, for instance, if we're approached nicely, that Harvard plenipotentiaries bribed the Carnegie Foundation to put the University at the head of their list; that, as a matter of fact, as everybody knows, Harvard's true rank rests somewhere between a Junior High School and Notre Dame; that there is a regular market in Harvard, between Professors and Students, for grades in their courses ranging from 20 cents for a D misses in Government to $ for a Phi Beta Kappa key.

We give up. There is no fish bigger than a big whale. Have your little fling in the public eye, Professor Owen, and then retire to your naval architecture, where, it is removed, you are sound, intelligent, expert, eminent, full baked.

We give up. There is no fish bigger than a big whale. Have your little fling in the public eye, Professor Owen, and then retire to your naval architecture, where, it is removed, you are sound, intelligent, expert, eminent, full baked.