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Summers Will Not Finish Semester of Teaching as Harvard Investigates Epstein Ties
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Harvard College Students Report Favoring Divestment from Israel in HUA Survey
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‘He Should Resign’: Harvard Undergrads Take Hard Line Against Summers Over Epstein Scandal
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Harvard To Launch New Investigation Into Epstein’s Ties to Summers, Other University Affiliates
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Harvard Students To Vote on Divestment From Israel in Inaugural HUA Election Survey
Startling news has reached the Harvard Yard this week that two of their brethren have transferred to the inferno Yale. Never before had they been so humiliated by such a procedure. However, feeling ran high as the Harvard students tried in vain to offer a plausible explanation that actually two transfers had been made. They finally managed to prepare a statement for the press which disclosed that, although there is no official record of a Harvard student over going to Yale before, 15 followers of Eli have transferred to the Harvard campus since the beginning of the Great War. Cambridge townspeople are now deafened by the cry "Harvard Leads 15-2." Cornell Sun.
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